In any given moment, we have choice. But what are the factors that allow us to see that there is choice, when our conditioning drives us to hold ourselves harmless and pawn off consequences to external factors beyond our control? One critical factor is being able to tolerate multiple states within our own experience. Even…
Author: ilanagrostern
Somatic Experiencing
Somatic Experiencing – What is it? The work I do is challenging to put into words. I didn’t realize until recently how I feel my way through the world – but through my body, not my emotions. The information we need to make decisions that honour who we are is not stored in the cognitive…
Gifted, And Owning It
The realization that I didn’t think like my peers came to me quite young. I lived in a fantasy world of stories for much longer than my cohort. My imagination and ability to play like a child lasted well into my teens. The imaginings were full bodied experiences, with heightened sensual components. When I could…
Mind Maps
This week I connected with the method of mind mapping my thoughts in order to understand my own processes better. I love the idea of using this technique as external storage. As well, the tactile experience of putting pen to paper and layering colours has reminded me of how much I enjoy making art, so…
Turning Down the Volume on Negative Self-Talk – Lessons from Sesame Street
Trying a vLog format instead of writing. Let me know your thoughts! The Sesame Street video I reference is embedded below.
Why What I Think Matters Less Than How I Think
Today I began my first intentional step on the road to becoming a more organized thinker. In November of 2020, when I enrolled in my coaching course, I was hoping that it would provide me with unprecedented (relative to my experiences with formal education) levels of intellectual challenge. It turns out that the methodology of…
Ideology vs. Philosophy
I’m in a very privileged position these days. Despite the chaos of trying to figure out which way is up through the charged experience of re-relating to my woman-child as we both go through a familiarly painful process of un-enmeshing and differentiating, the current version of this storm is offering me, once more, ample opportunity…
Setbacks and Disappointments
Setbacks and disappointment – What do we do when faced with these unavoidable circumstances? We could whine, complain, self-flagellate, blame others or ourselves. Or we could choose to lean into the understanding that this is life. The Stoic approach to life appeals to me on so many levels. Before I began to actively learn about…
When It All Comes Together
In early November I embarked on a brand new challenge. After 15 years as an entrepreneur, almost 17 years of motherhood, and with much more information about what is possible in relationship, it’s time for something entirely different. Except it’s not that different, I don’t think. It’s more like a convergence of all the things…
Where the Stillness Lives
How to put into the words the recent experience of moving my life to the back of my body? How to properly explain the emptiness at the front that isn’t loss or lack? How to communicate the peace that comes through the knowing, finally, that everything is exactly as it is meant to be? A…
My introduction to equanimity
Eight years ago when I first embarked with intention on my wellness journey, I began posting photos of my belly on social media. The purpose was definitely brag related, but it was never about weight. It was always about how the outward appearance of my belly reflected a state of inner chaos, and how the…
Ilana Grostern Coaching 