As I wait for my painfully slow dryer to remove the remaining dampness from the clothing I want to wear to work today, I am thinking about BREASTS. This summer I made the decision to become more comfortable with the nature of my breasts, and release myself from the conditioning that requires them to be…
Author: ilanagrostern
My Great Brain
Do you remember the moment when you first became aware of an aspect of yourself that you continued to appreciate throughout the course of your life? Did you notice something in another that you were then able to see in yourself? Did you discover that you were exceptional in one area? Did you discover something…
FINDING LOVE DURING A GLOBAL CRISIS – THE IMPORTANCE OF BEING WITNESSED
Towards the end of April I found myself in a place I’d visited before. I was two and a half months out of a relationship that had ripped my world apart with its ending — for the second time. Unlike the first time that relationship ended, the waves of grief were, astoundingly, still surprising me…
We Must Have Order
The language is shifting again.Inhuman behaviours get normalized.Science stands in for god.One signals their virtue by way of conformity,A cute swatch of fabric covering a petrified face. Blend in.Disappear.Masks make right.Amplify the rhetoric.It is dangerous to oppose.Do not allow your individuality to emerge.You might get sick.They might come for you instead. Goosestepping off the sidewalk,Two…
Breaking Up (with social media) Is Incredibly Hard to Do.
It is SO hard to leave social media. I thought I’d left it, but now I know that in this life, and without much more blood sacrifice, I may never be able to truly pull free. On November 16, I pulled the plug on Facebook. I was firm about it. In no uncertain terms, I let…
Resilience and The Edge
In the last two years I’ve experienced divorce after 20 years of marriage, a move, major business challenges, a breakup, and massive attacks from members of communities that I have built. I’d had the arrogance to think that I’d done the work to heal my wounds, that I was tough as nails, and that the…
If I think a thought and don’t put it on the internet, do I really exist?
If I think a thought, and don’t receive 50 likes in validation, did I really even think it? If I feel a feeling and don’t share it with my closest friends, did I even feel it? It’s 2019 and I’m relearning what it means to be on my own, responsible entirely for my own thoughts…
The Impossible Pursuit of Happiness – Lessons from Shtisel
“Happiness cannot be pursued; it must ensue.” ― Viktor E. Frankl, Man’s Search for Meaning With all this time I’ve carved out in my life because I quit Facebook, I can now indulge in the pleasure of diving into an engrossing show. My next step will be to simply sit and enjoy the show for…
What Happened When I Stopped Complaining and Started Listening
This weekend marked a full two calendar months since I left Facebook, for good. I remember a day when not checking it for a day felt like a massive test of will. Now, the idea of entering back into that particular drama-ridden fray leaves me dyspeptic. My friend looked at me the other week and…
Cutting through the Noise
Tomorrow it will be five weeks since I left Facebook. I’m still alive. I barely recognize myself. My cage of choice is much smaller than the previous version. But now the decor is more to my taste, and I am in full control of who I choose to allow to occupy it with me. If…
How Accountable Are You?
It’s a big word, accountability. At its base, from dictionary.com: ac·count·a·bil·i·ty /əˌkoun(t)əˈbilədē/ noun the fact or condition of being accountable; responsibility. “their lack of accountability has corroded public respect” There is so much to read on the subject, but there’s so much more room for nuance than most people understand. Did you know that…
On Responsibility
It’s been one week since I broke up with social media. I intend for this to be a permanent move. I was enmeshed. I was beyond choice. I was irresponsible. I was addicted. And I am done. A wise woman said to me this week, “You are running water. Running water cannot be stopped. It…
Ilana Grostern Coaching 